Thursday, May 7, 2009

Hilarious fortune cookies from Linux Mint Shell

*) You will have a long boring life.

*) You will be run over by a bus.

*) How do you keep a moron in suspense?

*) You will be incarnated as a toad; and you will be much happier.

*) Your ignorance cramps my conversation.

*) Don't plan any hasty moves. You'll be evicted soon anyway.

*) Your fly might be open (but don't check it just now).

*) You are not dead yet. But watch for further reports.

*) Excellent time to become a missing person.

*) Perfect day for scrubbing the floor and other exciting things.

*) You may be gone tomorrow, but that doesn't mean that you weren't here today.

*) You are a fluke of the universe; you have no right to be here.

*) Don't hate yourself in the morning -- sleep till noon.

*) Be careful! UGLY strikes 9 out of 10!

*) After your lover has gone you will still have PEANUT BUTTER!

*) Beware of Bigfoot!

*) You definitely intend to start living sometime soon.

*) Fine day to work off excess energy. Steal something heavy.

*) Don't look now, but there is a multi-legged creature on your shoulder.

*) You have a strong appeal for members of your own sex.

*) Cheer Up! Things are getting worse at a slower rate.

*) You will be attacked by a beast who has the body of a wolf, the tail of a lion, and the face of Donald Duck.

*) You are sick, twisted and perverted. I like that in a person.

*) Tonight's the night: Sleep in a eucalyptus tree.

*)Tonight you will pay the wages of sin; Don't forget to leave a tip.

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